The Joke That Backfired

If you didn't know it, I have 3 childern, two girls and a boy. A couple of years ago, when my son was 8 I thought I'd play a joke on him. He was at that age where it is important to be a 'big boy' and do things by yourself. Thus he always wants to go to the bathroom whenever we go somewhere. Something about being away from home makes his bowels quite active. At any rate, we were at a restaurant one evening and he had to go to the bathroom. Having proven his ability to do this himself I generally let him go back there but I follow him closely for his own safety. On one such occasion I had an idea that thought it would be fun. Immediately after he went into the bathroom to go #2, I went in after him.  I then balled up several paper towels and threw them over the stall at him.

I have to tell you, it was hard not to laugh out loud. I was getting a cramp from holding in my laughter when he came back to the table and said, "Dad.....somebody was throwing paper at me when I was going potty." This scenario played out several more times over the next couple of months, everytime he would go to the bathroom when we went out, I'd go and throw the towels again. Soon he would just come out to the table and say, "That man is here, the one that throws towels". By this time, my wife is telling me to stop before he gets a complex.

This brings us to the night I stopped throwing towels. We went to dinner and as usual Mr. Bowel Boy (my son) had to go #2 and so as usual, I waited a couple of minutes and went in and begin making nicely packed paper towel balls and throwing them over the stall door at him (that's what cool dads do). That was when I heard in a very deep voice say, "I'm going to kick somebody's a$$ when I get out of here. I see your shoes buddy and you won't be hard to find."

It turns out my son had already left the bathroom (false poopy alarm on his part) but he doubled back to the table via a different route. I must've missed him when I was going in so the occupied stall was NOT occupied by him. I made a quick exit, threw down way too much money on the table, grabbed the family and left.

I can tell you this, the man that throws towels doesn't come around anymore :)